Bestselling author Dr Rangan Chatterjee is regarded as one of the most influential doctors in the UK … and he’s too late.
He comes apologizing on our Skype call, in a rumpled T-shirt, and with a big smile – and goes on generously giving us half an hour more than our allotted time.
Humble, honest and inspiring, pausing intensely after every question I ask, Chatterjee is passionate about his healthy life story. I can see why his podcast Feel Better, Live More has received 50 million downloads so far and is consumed every month by over 6 million people.
In his last four best-selling books, his focus was firmly on the health arena – from losing weight to creating healthy habits – but in his new book, Happy Mind, Happy Life (Penguin Life, £ 16.99), he turned his attention to turned. fortunately. What for?
“Stress is implicated in about 90% of what a doctor like me sees on a daily basis,” he tells Metro.co.uk. ‘But when we feel calm, content and in control of our lives, we become healthier.
“I have seen time and time again that this is true: when we truly and deeply feel happy in our lives and with our lives, the consequences for our health are profound.”
The old tropics of “if we want to be healed badly enough, we will find the inner strength for it” are not true, he says.
‘It is wrong to say that success comes from mental strength, and failure comes from mental weakness. Our daily habits are not a reflection of our strength or weakness of mind. They are a reflection of how we feel about ourselves and the world around us. ‘
Feel happier and we have a much better chance of creating a healthy life, says Rangan. The good news? “Happiness is not an impossibly distant destination, or a state of mind reserved for the privileged,” he notes. ‘It’s trainable and accessible to everyone.
‘If you practice happiness a little, you will become a little happier. If you practice a lot, you will be transformed. You find that you have a brand new relationship with yourself. You will understand yourself in a way that is fresh and liberating and beautiful. ‘
Hey, Dr. Rangan! What is happiness?
I have a sentence for it. I call it Core Happiness and think of it as a three-legged stool. Each of the legs is separate but essential. If one of them is thrown away, your happiness will probably collapse.
The first leg of the stool is satisfaction. Feeling content means peace with your life and your decisions.
The second leg is control. Being in control means that you feel capable of making sensible decisions and that nothing, within reason, has the power to overcome you.
The third leg is alignment. Feeling aligned means that the person you want to be, and the person you are actually out in the world, are one and the same. You are aligned when your inner values fit into your daily actions.
Why do so many people report feeling stressed and unhappy?
We lack success for happiness. I believe that for most people the single biggest reason they go around with a hole in their heart – which they unsuccessfully try to fill with a whole range of compensatory behaviors such as alcohol, junk food, sugar and overwork – is because they have this fundamental Feeler made.
So what does make us happy?
True happiness comes from within. When we define success, we also define failure.
When we decide that a truly lived life is one in which all our material desires are fulfilled – like having the perfect sofa for our stuff, planning the “perfect” birthday party for our kids, eating at the last restaurant and then posting about it on social Media, etc. – we have also decided that if we do not succeed in constantly ‘winning’, we are a mistake. This is a recipe for misery.
What is the first step to feeling happier?
Redefine success. Decide what is enough and use that to define what a successful week and life really looks like.
It’s not about making more money, getting a promotion at work or buying a new toy. These are things that really bring you happiness and ‘Wool Brain’, the part of you that is convinced that a plate of chocolate, a bigger television or a promotion at work will make you happy.
The consistent but surprising result is that activities that the desire brain sells us as ‘fun’, such as eating chocolate, watching TV or going around the shops, actually leave us less motivated, less confident and more depressed.
Instead, develop happiness habits. Write down three things that will give you an intense sense of well-being. See if you can do it every week. For example, a successful week for you could include a walk in nature, an Epsom salt bath and three meals at the table with your family. Or maybe it’s time to spend with one of your good friends, time to play your guitar and go out for lunch with your mom. Your happiness habits will be unique to you.
The voice in your head is louder than you think
But what can we do about our horribly unhealthy habits?
Learn to love yourself. A person who truly loves himself is unlikely to engage in sabotaging behaviors such as disappearing an entire pack of chocolate cookies or drinking excess alcohol.
The latest scientific research makes this clear. It has been found that people who are self-sufficient are more likely to take care of themselves and adopt healthy lifestyle habits. People who write a self-compassionate letter every day for seven days are happier even three months later.
It’s been an awful few years. The daily news feed is gruesome. How can we improve our happiness even in dark times?
Try talking to yourself differently. Research by psychologist Ethan Kross finds that when we are in the middle of a high pressure situation, we should talk to ourselves about how we treat our child, our best friend, or a work colleague we admire. He even recommends that we label ourselves with our own names. When we do that, we create a distance between us and the problem, and this gives us more control.
The voice in your head is louder than you think.
Who inspires you?
One of my most inspiring guests on my podcast was psychologist Dr. Edith Eger, one of the last remaining Holocaust survivors. Edith was a trained ballet dancer and gymnast and was sent to Auschwitz.
Hours after her parents were sent to the gas chamber, the angel of death, Nazi officer Dr. Josef Mengele, forced Edie to dance his amusement – and her survival. She used her imagination to believe that she was not dancing in Auschwitz, but in the Budapest Opera House. There was a full orchestra and a large audience.
I thought it was awful how she changed her experience. She told me that the largest prison you or anyone will ever live in is the prison you create in your own mind. It had a huge impact on me.
Reframing your inner story is a very powerful thing that will have a huge impact on your happiness. Try asking questions like: Is the way I feel about the other person really right? Why does this situation really bother me? How would it feel if I chose a different perspective? What prevents me from choosing a story that empowers me instead of enslaving me?
There are endless situations that we face in the world that we cannot change. But we can change our reaction. We create our own reality.
Dr. Rangan’s three ways to be happy today:
Talk to strangers
A 2021 study by psychologists Paul van Lange and Simon Columbus found that positive interactions with strangers ‘help us serve our basic needs, how to feel connected, appreciated, along with the realization of personal growth in ourselves’. They advised people to “initiate short interactions, even a laugh, for strangers”, as this provides us with a critically important social nutrient they call Vitamin S.
Beware of unexpected telephone use
Psychology professor Laurie Santos, of Yale University in Connecticut, finds that ‘just deciding to stay out of social media will have a greater effect on your happiness than earning $ 100,000 or marrying the love of your life’.
Other research has found that we laugh 30% less when our phone is present – so put your phone away.
Redefine who you are
Your personal identity comes from your values. What do you really value in life? For example curiosity or family or creativity or solitude or nature?
Choose three values and commit to living them. Take a moment each week to evaluate how you are doing to become that person. Write down your values to help you set your intentions and to help you hold yourself accountable.
Happy Mind, Happy Life: 10 Simple Ways to Feel Great Every Day by Dr Rangan Chatterjee will be released by Penguin Life on March 31, for £ 16.99
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